We have chosen to give our children a lot of freedom in the sense of exploration and risk taking. I have never discouraged my children from trying to climb, run, swing, build, etc. Maybe that is why my first born walked when she was only 8 months old? I doubt it, but I don't know. What I know is that I am raising confident young girls who are not afraid to try something new.
I know that our parenting style is different from many others, but it has worked for us thus far. I never try to push my style on others, esp. strangers in a park. Therefore, I ask that you other parents, especially those whom I do not know, please do not hover around my children and discourage them.
This morning while playing in the park with the girls I asked that Blaire say something in order that I could hear her and place her (Kids World can be insane with two kids going opposite directions). She did just as I asked, and I could tell she was basically directly above us, where I had expected. Suddenly I hear a mothers voice telling her "No, don't do that. Your mommy is down there. NO, Claire, wait." I realized she was talking to my daughter, Blaire, so I stated, "No she is okay". Her response, "but she's not headed towards the slide but down the ladder!" OMG! Down the ladder?! Should I call the firemen? Seriously lady? I responded, "that's fine. She can do that if she'd like." Well, Blaire, freaked out by some strange lady telling her that she was unable to do something, which mind you she has down countless times in the last 2 years without assistance, decides that maybe she can't after all. She began to get herself on the top of the ladder and went berserk! Screaming "No, I can't!" I attempted to redirect her, "Blaire, we don't say can't. It's how can I make this work?" She looked, began again, and once again freaked. After another attempt or two to reassure her, I realized that it was a lost cause, this woman had deterred her, had convinced her that she couldn't climb a ladder. Finally, I just had to remove myself from the situation and allow her to follow. We did attempt to go back, yet she still believed that she was somehow unable to climb down the ladder. She screamed some more. The woman, seeing how my daughter was reacting did apologize, "I didn't mean for that to happen." Well, then you should not have parented my child. I was close by, we were speaking to one another, she was in no immediate danger.
Another parent, seeing my daughter fall an entire 3 inches to the ground on her knees, gasped and reached for her. I was a few feet away with the other child and usually B would wipe off and get back again. Yet, because this parent was intent that my child must have terribly hurt herself, thus,B ran to me. I helped wipe her off and reassured her. Luckily, when she went back the other parent had left and B was free to continue jumping onto the rings and swing (though she started slowly) without the gasping and over reactions. Kids fall. It happens. Again, she was in no immediate danger.
So please, I beg of you, if you chose to be an overbearing, helicopter parent, that is fine, but please keep your hovering to your own child(ren). Do not condemn my children to the same fate as yours. I am happy with how we are doing over here and would like my girls to continue to be strong, willing, confident, & trusting (of their own abilities and of my parenting).
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